LAST WORDS OF 2008

at the last few moments of 2008, i would be at the comfort of my home and away from the hustle and bustle of countdown parties islandwide. i'm not an introvert, neither is it that i have no friends. but the fact is im down with chicken pox and that's going to keep me quarantined for quite some time.

looking back at 2008, it wasn't exactly a bad year, but there were surely some nasty times.
a year plagued by injuries, setbacks, loss of form and luck likewise, i couldn't wait for the year to end. april 4th was the day i fell down hard and had a badly sprained ankle, i wouldnt forget that incident. that limited my leg movement altogether and i wouldnt mind if the others blamed me for the losses in the A Div matchups, i was certainly not up to standard at all.
results fell and failed to pickup since god-knows-when. results just plummeted. they plunged down and for that i didnt score an A for any major math exam.
i couldn't get over emoing as well, making "aiya i emo la" my favourite line at one point in time. this eventually led to my secondary schoolmates feeling i have changed.

on the other hand, 2008 was defintely a year to celebrate as well . A second year in tpjc taught me some harsh life lessons, broadened my perspectives and enlarged my circle of friends. seemingly i got to know some people better which eventually changed my impression on them.

but to think that i'm gonna end 2008 at home alone, all sick and tired just dampens my mood. although the year of the rat isnt over which may explain why my luck haven really changed alot, my luck will for certain change in less than a months time, and obviously for the better(ihope)

till then, a very happy new year to all. :D

sick before the last few days of 2008. great. now my money in my ezlink card will come to waste. :/

me being down with illness also means...
NO COUNTDOWN WITH THE BROTHERHOOD TMR FOR ME. :(

wad a lousy year, being down with luck when i most need it.
sighs~
oh wells, at least i didnt miss christmas this year.

26/12/2008

it's always nice to go out with the old pals. sort of a post christmas celebration, we went for lunch, settler's and dinner. and im glad that someone(i so happen to forget who, i guess its alab) felt that i was back to my "normal" self, away from emoing and all. that's good, cos i felt good that day as well.

its a cold day today.
just plain cold.
everything was cold.

chilly christmas morning

merry christmas to all :D
its really nice waking up today with a breeze in your face and all, nice weather whch sort of puts a dreamy feel to xmas this year.
its especially touching to see certain people's success stories on TV. it sort of adds a special meaning to it on christmas.
on the side note, the weather's giving me feelings of cramps in my legs, and a re-enactment of old ailments. oh wells. its christmas have fun. (:

it's really tough to find something to do when you got nothing up your sleeve, collar, whereever.
luckily the new year is just around the corner and clearing my cupboard becomes part of my must-do-list before the year ceases. so i spent much of my day clearing stuffs and still my cupboard looks all but orderly. and i find myself staring into blank space more often recently :/
Heh.

I'M BORED! =.=

and now there are more sighs from me. is this a case of emoing? damn i thought this feeling would go once holidays arrive.

im confused.
it's weird not to have any school related stuff whatsoever bugging me during year end holidays. work's over and my lifestyle becomes more mundane than ever. the weather is far from satisfactory, with showers thwarting my plans to go for a jog or bball session.
oh wells. four more months to enlistment. guess i'll have to find something to work on during this period of time.
results arent out yet, and my future remains to be uncertain.
christmas is coming yet i dont feel any love.


enough of my rants. out with sec sch buddies recently to sentosa and didnt catch any sun cos i was late. and boy, i have fugly tan lines. dined at some hawker centre opposite habour front centre and jh termed it as a haven of cheap food which was a perfet place for L-mer. lololol. hokkien mee carrotcake satay sugarcane, wasnt exactly filling but still it was cheap, just 5 bucks!!! (ok we shared the cost of the satay.) chilled out at the vivo roof, and i was reminded of the old get together we had during our sec school times.
at least it brought me back a smile.


last day of work- had a free buffet which was great, but towards the end drank my beer a wee bit too fast and end up with a headache for the next few hours. working at uwc was tiring but defintely an enriching and fun experience.


i guess that's about all. tata.

tomorrow is finally going to be last day at work. (:

work is finally coming to an end. yay, cos im freaking worn out from waking up so early everyday and i cant stand the ordeal of standing in the mrt every morning.
new job hunting soon. (:

that guy bside me is aaron.
we've been friends and school mates for nearly 12 years(just one more month to go) and here we are wearing ngeeann related shirts posing as secondary students. lol.
time flies, NS awaits us. sadly almost all my close buddies are heading to NS in January, way before my enlistement date. btw this guy is going in next week. and another is already in there.
months later i'll be left all alone to bball by myself...

im gonna leave this post hanging cos i seriously have no idea how to end it. all the best people.


"when u do things with your heart, something's gotta shine."

working as usual for the past week, being late for work as usual.
only thing different is we had bball chalet yesterday!

btw i realised many things yesterday and today.
1) sitting behind on a lorry is really fun.
2) work is getting a little too boring.
3) i cant bloody drink jim beam raw.
4) if u cant sleep wake up and drink some beer. lol.
5) i cant work after chalet. its chui de lor.
6) acting blur is the best policy to counter sabotage attempts. ?_?
7) dun ever dare derek to do anything. lololol.
8) people are still laughing at my jokes!!! LMAO! :D

kays that's about all. work at UWC is coming to an end next week. job hunting is going to start soon again.

till next time, ima gonna catch some much needed sleep. nxt week is gotta be busy, working everyday.

tata~

~backtrack.
had pri sch class gathering earlier this week.
turnout wasn't as great as last year. but no one is to blame for the "poor" turnout except for the poly timetables. and obviously million thanks to farrhan for taking his time off.
still, gathering was fun as usual. to be able to meet up with old friends and teacher brings back fond memories of the past. too bad ALL the girls boycotted this year's gathering. :/
free meals is always great and we had one at simpang bedok. yc's steak smelled absoultely brilliant and welsonn's mexicana version looked ultimately edible. my rotijohn king wasn't exactly bad either.
a brilliant weather together with a cool night breeze made this gathering a rather unforgettable one.

today went to work, tiring labour work but well its rather fun.
which college has the most number of pretty girls? united world college! lol.

end of the road.

hurray! i made it to the end of JC life.
so i'll have to wait patiently for a few months till my results are released.
looking back at the Alvls period, it was tough, but i managed to survive it anyway.
at times, life wasnt as happy as i predicted it would turn out to be, but i managed to break a smile somehow.
many tpjcians have made an enormous impact on me. some were negative externalities others merit goods i couldnt wait to get my hands on. ( sounds sick but wadever)
im seriously grateful to all bballers for making my years here very fun, the only regret i have was being unhealthy during the competition period. ha. oh wells.

i chose this path 2 yrs ago. i only regretted it alittle, cos i still believe that my slump in grades were largely due to the school environment. (i was too slack haha.) on the bright side i got to know some really good friends.


its the end. hope we'll all still keep in contact. (:

dang. 2nd last paper was demoralising. totally.
now im worrying for my chem results again.
crappy mcq.

wow seriously, complacency kills.

2 more paper 1 to go. weet!

total screw up for econs man. NOT ENOUGH TIME LA!!! i seriously think the MOE should review econs exam time. need more time la i left my essay part b blank can. zzz. worse of all i know how to do la. sian.
and this afternoon, i bid farewell to econs, hopefully forever.

bballed after econs today. my ankle didnt seem to affect me much. neither did my knee. great. i shall take it slow before either ofthem decide to give way again. haha.

2 more papers. last stretch. final steps. phew. finally.

im restless. dang.
4 more papers.
retarded exam life, i cant hope for it to end quickly.
i have shed some kilos. now im bloody underweight.

the first week of the A's is over. no more maths and GP for 2008!!!
5 more papers to go till i bid farewell to tpjc.
haha. if you'll ask me, i'd say, so far so "good".

3 papers down only and yauho is cursing me on my tagboard. great. that's the last thing i nid.

ITS ALMOST HERE!

2 more weeks la!
im so not prepared.
this week is crucial.
so pals, do not disturb!

"THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE LOOKING AT YOU FROM THE SHADOWS."

had an outing i didnt had in ages.

saturday: was out with my classmates for a so called "farewell dinner". food was far from satisfactory. pooled after that to realise i totally lost the pool touch. it took me 4 times to pocket a ball. -.-
backtrack: out of coincidence i met esther at tampines interchange lol, then i grabbed a free coke zero outside tp mrt and it's still in my fridge. lol.
friday was practically "taking photos day."

*some prob uploading photos i shall do so some other time.*

graduation day.

today is the official final day of sch, everyone's gotta part sometime. though i dun exactly like tpjc, but im pretty sure, im gonna still miss my days here, miss my friends here, and of cos miss the bballers who reallyreally made my days in tpjc enjoyable.
photos wun be up until i got all of them from zhanghan.

this post is dedicated to all 07s17 peeps, bballers, random friends, tchers alike. do know im so gonna miss u all. haha.

2 yrs ago i said this, and im still going to say it. dang! i ahte emotional sendaways.
makes me superduper emo. tsk.

although i didnt did much today, i didn't exactly waste my saturday away like most saturdays.
im pleased with that. (:

stupid school is slowing down my learning by taking down the prelim papers from tpjc.net. dumbness + lameness.

its officailly <30 days to the A's.
operation "chiong like there's no tomorrow" has just officially begun.

too many prelim papers left undone.
looking at the calendar, there is not much time left. (1 month more la!)
i promised myself not to procrastinate, but i failed miserably.
on the bright side, i rejected an offer to play bball today. :)? :(?

oh and just yesterday, mr lim started preaching abt buddism when just some time ago he was talking abt christianity. lolness.

oh and just this morning i spent 2 hrs since waking up till now to print out some econs stuffs to be done. 2 hrs man. wad a waste of time. somemore no one talk to me online make me feel even worse. lol.

ciao~

its only a matter of time before things come to light.
纸是包不住火的， 我认命了。

to think i might just perish bcos of someoneelse's blunder and ignorance.
ohmygodness somebody pleasepleaseplease tell me this is so NOT possible.
crap.

and im hungry like crap today. i just cant stop eating after my lunch at home. goodness.

andand i heard electrical bills are going to be raised by 20% nxt month or something. i guess that's another incentive for me to stop using the com and start my intensive studying :/

now i know what the feeling of crappy means. :///

random

fried icecream... mango pudding...

its a pity i dun see fried icecream anywhere now. and i certainly cant find a mango pudding that is classified under delicious.

i remeber eating fried icecream from 2 places. one was the very famous one at tiong bahru, the other one was at a pasar malam at payar lebar. (i vividly remeber it was nearing hari raya and the place was swarming with people.)
the latter tasted much better though the size was smaller, much like that of a fist. i cant rmb what flavour it was, but it was dammmmmm nice.
the one at tiongbahru was full of air, nothing else. but still it was super famous.

today, the issue about mango pudding is that it just doesnt taste nice anymore. it have been many years since i last tasted one that was worth eating. now its more like mango agar-agar feel than a mango soft mashy pudding feel ( not to forget the intense milk to be poured on top of the mango pudding. yumyum. )

ok, i was being totally random. (:

the apocalypse

haha bible teachings about the apocalypse in gp class today, end up when asked who in the class was christian or catholic, no one raised their hand. haha.

i was watching orphra's big give yesternight.
it just occured to me how beautiful compassion is.
im insipired to do my part for the needy when i get richer.
imagine making someone's life so much bttr when u don;t even feel a pinch about the money u donate.

finally the sweet taste of victory.

despite a slow start, we managed to win every single game.
i saw perseverance during the match that we almost lost. anyway guess what? we almost lost to some small kids. 11-8. that game is latched in my memories. we didnt have wilson and jianhong cos they left with their gfs already.
but still i find it difficult to dish out the ball. i conclude after todays game that my ball sense is weak and my vision is constrained.
and i realised i bought a wrong shoe. it doesnt support my style of play in any way. damn. no wonder its called force. im forced to wear it now. lol.

i thought about it, im postive im going to miss jc life though im always saying i hate it. (:

i was astonished to wake up and find myself sprawled on living room sofa.
it was 3am through the night.
i have no idea how i get there, but im positive i went to sleep in my bed.
guess im just too tired. has.

absence...

i just don't understand why im wasting my saturday away again.
and for spending time on the com? damn myself.
looks like studying/mugging/learning is absent from my weekend.
cos tmr im bloody hell gg out. if i knw this is gg to happen, i shudnt have even planned to go out. craps. i shud have thought about elmer's words.
sighs~

motivation appears to be absent again. wires in my brain don't seem to connect. yet castles form so quickly above my head.
i didnt come to a jc for nothing. i was known to be smarty pants for obvious reasons, yet i couldnt even get an A grade anywhere. its absence is certainly missed.

procrastination on the other hand seems to kick in so ever frequently. although i have dedicated my past week doing chem papers, it appears that i havent actually done enough for me to boast about. nor is it enough for me to overtake the geniuses in TPJC.

there is more than schoolwork and alvl preparation that im procrastinating about. there is still something else like yadayada to think and worry about.


im hoping things doesnt get worse, cuz it sounds rather screwed up already.

but i'll just smile my negative thoughts away. :)

48 more days, dats all i got.
and god dammit, im still going downhill.

i just discovered a new hate!!!
anything that relates to fishy smell. esp cooked food!!! (i dun really mind sashimi though)
damm the fishy smell totally spoilt my dinner.
tsk.

another wasted weekend.
im feeling to guilty.

the last assembly, results and post number 100.

today marks the last ever assembly im going to have as a tpjcian.
the last time singing national anthem and pledge in uniform.
my, im going to miss morning assembly.


prelims results are out. it aint really well done, but i still managed to pass all of em nonetheless.
BCDEE
true enough i haven got an A since last yr.
i shall learn from my mistakes and move on.


yep this is post number 100 on this url.


it's rachel's bday today and tecko's and khookhoo's tmr.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY :D

prelim results will be out tmr!!!
what an enticing wait.

promos starts tmr! good luck juniors dun get urself retained! XD

很感激 這城市擁擠的交通
讓你我 還能多相處幾分鐘
人潮中 怕失散所以輕輕拉你的手
一刻不放鬆 不放鬆

忍不住 想要愛你的衝動
不確定你屬於我 會有點寂寞
你給的幸福 在我心中自由走動
撫平我每一個傷口
忍不住 想要吻你的衝動
不確定我的執著 能讓你感動
我只能相信自己感受 不怕失落
關於你的一切 我想要比誰都懂

我的心 是被你設定的鬧鐘
提醒我 想你的時間不夠用
為什麼 平淡的事情現在忽然生動
是你改變我 你改變我

忍不住 想要愛你的衝動
不確定你屬於我 會有點寂寞
你給的幸福 在我心中自由走動
撫平我每一個傷口
忍不住 想要吻你的衝動
不確定我的執著 能讓你感動
我只能相信自己感受 不怕失落
關於你的一切 我想要比誰都懂

你是情人 還是朋友
還沒勇氣 想得太多
你的世界 如此遼闊
我會在哪個角落

忍不住 想要愛你的衝動
不確定你屬於我 會有點寂寞
你給的幸福 在我心中自由走動
撫平我每一個傷口
忍不住 想要吻你的衝動
不確定我的執著 能讓你感動
我只能相信自己感受 不怕失落
關於你的一切 我想要比誰都懂

to sum up my sep hols in 1 word,

wasted.


too much time is wasted in thinkin and livin amongst the clouds and beneath the earth.

sighs~ procrastination(is there such a word?)


i shall Procrastinate no more.



at times its never too late to turn back.

i guess i just need someone
or maybe even something...

to drag me back to earth.

that one friendly, compassionate nudge.



then again. somethings only can be done by myself.


for a start, i shall abandon this blog. abandon my previous ideas of editting the blog code.

http://www.latimes.com/video/?autoStart=true&topVideoCatNo=default&clipId=2876186

LOL. lebron loses horse challenge. lol.


its time to go green with a green blog. i shall edit the code when i got time. meanwhile thats the pic i've been working on. (:

daily dime.

i've officially wasted my sep holidays away. damm im so going to lose to those muggers. jialat.

to add on to that, i've wasted my time doing this so called "imba" mjc 07 prelim chem question. i've solved it. like finally. cos there is a bloody error in the question!!! i guess those mj teachers wrote so many paragraphs that they didnt realise there was a numerical mistake!!! no wonder i couldnt get the R. (obviously i was so full of myself and checked the answer to find out im right.) but then again, i didnt finish it in 15mins like how i predicted i would. in fact i took bloody hell 15 min to digest the question. LOL.

im soooo not ready for the A's.


bye.

checking back.

i just finished "five people you meet in heaven" by mitch albom.
to my dismay i wasnt really intrigued as i was when i read his other book "tuesdays with morrie"
but still, it is a good book, such that it brings about really insipiring messages. it makes me wonder why and for whom i live for.

5 lessons learnt. maybe more.

im seriously plagued with injuries this year.
from the most trivial of wounds, to hard knocks, to the sprained ankle.
im running low on luck.
and great, i just fell and now my left hip like chui. its difficult to walk and the constant pressure applied on my right knee when i jump or wad is hurting it badly.
wthell?

the end or the beginning?

yes its over!
its over!
prelims are so freaking over!
but so what? A lvls are there man. its just across the river. (omgodness what a lousy fig of speech)
end of prelims marks the start of intensive mugging for the 'A's
urhur as if im stoopid enough to go about doin that.

for now, i shall just take a break.

craps.
3 more days of prelims left.
the previous days were crap.
DEMORALISING.
yep i guess that tells us the whole story.
so currently im unmotivated and damn keen to play bball though i skipped a session at siglap earlier.

so play till dead seems to be my motto today. and i spent practically every minute of my time on the com since my bath. that's 9 dearly hours gone.

so im banned for tmr and sunday obviously. and 2 more days of studyin and im free for awhile.

sighs. i bttr go off now.

im done taking orders.
no one can bring me down except myself.
im just goin to take a step at a time i guess.


3 more days. just 3 more days to prelims.
damm for once i feel so very afraid.
3 more days 4 more subjects.
my heart is throbbing hard, my mind is clobbering.
i dun feel right, i dun feel good.
but all i can do, is to take a step at a time. stop wasting time thinkin abt emo stuffs and all.
stop bearing grudges.
well, jus stop thinking.
3 days left. its about time i got serious.

great, its study break and i find myself sick.
it just pains me to see how time flickers away while i try to get myself in working condition.
damm it. im sick really.
bloody hell damm it!

and yep there goes my precious study time while im typing this whole lot of crap.
holy craps prelims are one week away and i haven even started revision?
good job weiqing. prepare to see mister Apocalypse knocking on ur door.

and not only am i sick but im totally emo now.
im not sure why or how emo found me, but dang it is here to stay.
shytshyt.

i better try to find a way to unload all this before my system breaks down even before the prelims.

countdowns and my usual ranting.

14 more days to my first prelim paper.
10 more days to elmo bday
7 more days to study break
5 more days to national day
4 more days to national day celebration
4 more days to beijing olympics
3 more days to alab bday
2 more days to jh bday

that shall tell u why sometimes i love countdowns and sometimes why i don't
14 days seem too fast. dang.


this post came late bcos im busy workin on another new blog piccy. its defintely going to be of higher standards than the one now.


i hate to walk the endless road, not knowing where my final destination is.
i hate the absence of oppotunities.
i hate it even more when i don't seize oppotunities.




"im crossed, im confused and im emotional. again."

that week... gone.

tests for the week are over. some few other tests next week.
oh gawd, sitting in that audi for 3 long hours sure is tiring.

im just here today to share some videos. i got no idea how to embed videos, kinda forgotten how to.

anyway, here are the urls...
erm, they are kinda white so just click around. (:
enjoy.

christian the lion.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=adYbFQFXG0U

love, its all around us ain't it. now i do believe that one will repay kindness shown to him in the most touching way... nope the lion didnt gobble the guy up.

ricky rubio
http://sports.yahoo.com/nba/blog/ball_dont_lie/post/YouTube-of-the-Day-Ricky-Rubio-freezes-Lithuani?urn=nba,95979
little did i wonder, pros are all around us. that was i brilliant move by the way, it was just slowed down in this video.

enjoy...

for that, i hate the sun.

one week after basking myself in the sun, my skin shed like nonsense.
now i look as if i have some skin problem.

each time it nears the third wk of a month, the pain in my right ankle just comes back to me.
tsk, i hate the feeling.
probably, it might kip me running for roadrun on wednesday. bsides i haven been running long D for like 2 months.

im going back to cmpb nxt month. i hope im cleared off all my lingering injuries then.

i had many talk cock sessions today(yes yumei i knw i told u not to use cock, but rubbish doesnt seem like a good substitute. do tell me if u can find a bttr word.)
i just realised i love to chat. my mouth cant stop. (:

it seems like everyone is stressed out now. im telling myself i won't get affected.


study plans tomorrow. suddenly im motivated to study. but how i wish playtime isnt over. tsk.

a busy week ahead.

another busy weekend packed with studying routines.
sometimes, i hope the alvls come and go quickly.
but then when that happens, im gonna lose the feel of schooling in uniform forever.
tsk.

hey you, help me get motivated. pretty please?

in search of my root 3...

The Square Root of 3 - Dave Feinberg
I’m sure that I will always be
A lonely number like root three
The three is all that’s good and right,
Why must my three keep out of sight

Beneath the vicious square root sign,
I wish instead I were a nine
For nine could thwart this evil trick,
with just some quick arithmetic

I know I’ll never see the sun, as 1.7321
Such is my reality, a sad irrationality

When hark! What is this I see,
Another square root of a three
As quietly co-waltzing by,
Together now we multiply
To form a number we prefer,
Rejoicing as an integer

We break free from our mortal bonds
With the wave of magic wands
Our square root signs become unglued
Your love for me has been renewed

~

weichang showed me this poem, nice poem. perfect.

now... where is my root 3?

i just feel better when i'm slacking somewhere away from home.
i managed to break out a sweat today, allow myself to tire. my mind was tired.
but i managed to give it enough rest today.
so tomorrow will be a busy day.

as the prelims draw near, i don't see my friends online so often anymore.
i wonder why i am here anyway.

seemingly, i do not know how to start studying.

this is bad. veryvery bad.

我的天空今天有点儿灰。
这不仅仅是歌词，
它也描述了我的心声。

http://youtube.com/watch?v=68c57RtPsgs

go watch this. i love the dance.

sweat it out.

i woke up at 7am today, only to find that the neighbourhood is still in a slumber...
so first thing in my mind was to actualli start studying or go back to my bed.
yes i chosen the latter and woke up at 930am instead.
maybe jus mayb i'll wake up earlier tomorrow. (im tired la)

yes i went for a sweat out session of bball today.
my legs are officially crushed.
but i had alot of fun. mark my words alot.
maybe nxt wk, i'll be able to slam the ball home. just maybe.
i just tried once and the ball bounced off the back of the rim.
i'll just try again nxt time.


i tot i could go slp happy today, but well, someone decided to act zai.
freak, prepare to be boycotted once again.

crossed. X

**** why is everyone pissing me off today.
dun expect me to submit to anyone of u.

anger management is certainly wad i nid recently and which no one is plannin to help me achieve.

this is sh*t

time flew away.

2 weeks gone...
several tests gone.
results aren't amazingly great.
in fact amazingly they sucked.
tell me i didnt waste my time studyin at home during the june hols...
problem could be im tired and the brain cannot work properly.

this weekend is a long one. im gonna rest. dats my priority. no pt pushing myself so hard and end up with lousy results.

on a lighter note, 2 jokers emerged and took over my emoing role. that's somethin new, cos usually im the one who is blamed for being an emo kid.

reader, sometimes i just hope to know what u are thinking...

new release.

after a demoralising first half of the year with a black blog, i decided to convert back to a white one. certainly things look brighter. muchmuch brighter. i'll make sure i get brighter as well.
things arent going like i wish for them to be, but its only a week into term 3, i shudn't expect more.

about the new skin: did it overnight and completed it today afternoon. i have to say everysingle pixel was my work. credits to jh who helped me thought of the name pirateship 005 wich he eventaully changed to pirate cruiser 005 cos it sounds cooler.
seems like im workin better with the mouse.

its amazing i took 45min and 15 min on wednesday and friday to score a "first basket of the day"
i wonder what timing it'll be next.

tests this week was crap, i'm not going to look back.
tests nxt wk, and here i am wasting the day away. poor me.


im so gonna look forward to school everyday. i shan't let fear control me.
and yes i am so going to be myself again. people, it's all about loving or hating me make your choice.

changes.

i sit in front of my screen and realise, the old me, is lost forever.

T-R-O-U-B-L-E

oh my gawd! i cant believe I'm so desperate to spell trouble.
like i always say "siao4 liao4, ji4 bai4 siao4 liao4"

this is crazy man, i'm not done with homework yet, I'm trying not to forsake studying physics, and then something made me emo and complain-y. it lasted from 9pm till now, no no time is still counting.

why is there even an online message thingy on tpjc.net? damn it.

basically my teacher just gave us some new econs work to do. and reminded us on our holiday econs homework. so total essay to be done by tues is 4, 2 outlines, 2 full essays one of which to be submitted for grading. also by tues, 2 case studies. and by thurs 3 essay outlines. wth? 9 assignments from econs. siao kia. 14 parts of essay to write. how to write sia. zzz.

GP i still gt 5 reading logs to write and somehow i just find it hard to comment on most of the articles.

i still have a 2hr15min chem practice paper, untouched.
thousand and one maths revision exercises that are full of queries.
the whole physics syllabus to read up and do some catch up on.

days left? 2. freak that.

and what's more? my ankle injury seems to be acting up again. it's getting all red and sore and the pain just comes when it feels like it.
looks like the pain never got away, it never did. but probably i'm already used to the pain. and probably last friday was my final appearence as a player. but obviously i hope it isnt.


btw xiao jing teng new album isnt really bad. looks like his vocals improved abit again.

holidays are coming to an end. shit.
there just don't seem enough time to study eh?
studying is learning.
and learning, its a lifelong thing. How can we humans with sanity even bother restricted the domain of learning to purely years, months, weeks and days?
10-24-7, in the end u will still get 365 days + 365 days + 365 days. wads the diff? damn it.
a way of studying smart? i think not, that's just a gimmick to fool yourself to study, which i see no point in doing so.
whats the point of studying every day now anyway? it doesn't guarantee u a good life in future.
no it doesn't.

and while im typing the above, yeechien sent me some kind of inspiration.
change the idea, don't mug. learn instead. don't make it sound so painful, make it sound interesting. i'm learning!
and yes, indeed i've learnt something.


"im gonna send impossibility some few lightyears away, cos it is getting rather annoying."

detached

a sense of detachment, a sense of loneliness.

damn it this is one reason i hate holidays which i need to bury myself in the notes.
it just makes me an emo kid.

i'm running without headway.
someday, i might very well just bang into a wall.
but let's hope that day doesn't come.

urgh, holidays doesn't seem to liberate my mind anymore.
Here i am sitting in front of the computer early in the afternoon, trying to understand my correlation and regression tutorial. sadly, my mind just gets more clogged up with other thoughts that i'm spending more than enough time on the computer.

it appears that i'm running out of gas.

to rest my ankle, i have absented myself from basketball sessions.
yes, total abstinence from basketball and all other sports.
and without basking in the sun, i'm feeling rather sickly.

and then, i'm counting down.
i glance over to my calendar, for once, i've not written many things on it.
but then, it appears that i have too little time and too many things to catch up on.

i'm getting lonely again.
i miss him, her and you.
i probably miss my old life.
and no matter how hard i'm trying to make time for them, i just can't make time for myself.

probably i'll just dump all my things in a corner and relax abit before holidays really end.

probably i just lack resting time. maybe i'll just waste my one day sleeping away. why not? i've been having good dreams lately, only to be woken up by my alarm clock.


i wonder why i have such a controlled life, and its not even controlled by me nor even my family. its by some nonsensical curriculum of the MOE. why can't we just go back to the cavemen stage? it's gonna be so much fun.


alright any more rambling i'll be even more behind time.

i shall sign off here. and i wonder who is going to waste their time reading this emo text. probably no one. haha.

service learning.

went for service learning last wednesday and friday at some student care centre.

i had fun though its sometimes frustrating when the kids go havoc.

took pictures for the last few minutes. shall upload them when i get them.

and i just realised i haven posted any team photos here.
so here goes.

the cement smell in my home is totally disgusting btw. drinking water taste like cement.

service learning day 1 - reminiscence

i had a carefree life as a primary school student.
crying then, was a liability.
how i miss those magnificent days...

today, we had service learning with some primary school kids at a student care centre.
making noise was chicken feet to them. totally noisy freaks. lol.

although i didnt do much today, im feeling damn lethargic right now. dumb.
had arts and craft session. thx to my good ol' pal ah long from ahlong pte ltd, i would say the session was a success. so it appears that kids these days love to brag. and end up, they cannot get their job done.


origami. reminded me of during primary school, when me and yeechien were busy folding ships. we got hold of free papers and began folding, and folding and folding. end up we got 2/3 huge bags of ships. we had a lot of fun then.

years past, and now im 18. im old.
i missed those days.
well, im moving on though, no worries.

service learning tomorrow. great, one less day to study.
but luckily it gives me a reason to escape my home which will be super dusty, i predict.
why? cos the contractors are coming down tomorrow to resurface the floor cos its leaking and the people staying under me are unhappy about it. and yes like typical singaporeans do, they complain. it will last until friday. gawd! how am i going to study in such an environment? dammit.

"money makes the world go round?" nah i'll agree more on this - "money is the root of all evil"
hell yea.

post number 67

gloomy days and darkdark nights.
i miss my sunshine.

going green?

the world certainly is heading towards green.


abit too late perhaps.

i ask myself how much carbon footprints i have already made.

and i ask myself how i can make do for my mistakes.


i finally came up with an answer.


NOTHING.

yes, i believe there is nothing i can do.

obviously because my decision to leave my carbon footprints lying around is totally irreversible.



the world seems to be doing something though. coming up with newer technologies to increase the efficiency of fuels and stuffs like that.


in the midst of research however, they seem to leave more carbon footprints that any other average carbon user.


let us just hope that in the long run this plan is going to work somehow.


this fight against environmental degradation is a gloal affair.
so switching off the light here and there will help. but, the effect is so minute that i guess i'll continue using the computer now.

haha.

isolation

im gonna isolate away from the world once again. from the computer from everyone i hope. that's probably gonna allow me to settle down and push for the brilliant finish to my uniform schooling life.
isolation i said. permanent isolation.

Secondhand Serenade - Fall for you

The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting
Could it be that we have been this way before
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core
But hold your breathe
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
Your impossible to find
This is not what I intended
I always swore to you i'd never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may of failed
But I have loved you from the start
Ohhhh
But hold your breathe
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
It's impossible
So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in
I'm yours to keep
And hold onto your words
Cuz talk is cheap
And remember me tonight
When your asleep
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
Tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
Your impossible to find

more well wishes.

first of all, sry abt that jus(:tin. well he wished me aniwae and i kinda left out his name. lol.
AND zach thx as well. :) although u call me join u soon. lol. but... NO FREAKING WAY! and dun tell me to edit again. lol.

in addition to that, 2 ppl jus wished me late into the night. belated or not i dun really care. its the thought that counts. so well, thanks again joeyee(: and :)rena.

im 18.

yes im 18, all of a sudden.
im old. an old bird. lol.

this year, tedja seems to be officially the first person to wish me happy birthday. lol.
and then we have the 2 who have the same birthday as me who wished me.
happy birthday to you 2 - bifei & chengliang. let's just enjoy the final 5 mins. (its 23:55 now btw)
then we have yinyong, jianhong, yongteck, jackie, aaron, weiquan, siewlong, yauho, elmer, ruban, yeechien, kayan, eugene, dazong, zhanghan, yanndar, wilson, guanyuan, yiliang, sebastian, yifeng, xinkai, huijia.
they are somewhat in order.
thankyou all of u. i appreciate it.

and i had a mini early birthday bullying yesterday. thanks to weichang, yongteck, jackie, eehong, marcus. "thankyou"
hmm pictures arent with me. sadly.


today, went to eat and bball with yinyong, aaron, jianhong, alan, elmer, eugene, yiliang. had fun.
and thanks for the treat aniwae.


its now 1205. i cant believe i took 10 mins to blog. haha.

that should be all. byebye.

final call.

half an hour more to go, till i'm 18.
almost 18 yrs have a stepped foot on Earth, and yet i know so little about it. how shameful.
sighs~
in addition to that, the cyclone nargis and the quake in chengdu produced such carnage to humans, my species. and yet, there is nothing i can do about it.
sighs~
things just don't seem to be going well lately.
lets hope my birthday tomorrow will help to cleanse my life abit.


hearty chats with many people have made me felt better.
but well, they cant always be there for me eh?


my grades are falling again. dammit.
it just dont seem right. bad form. totally bad form.
probably incompetent will be a better word.
but well, i shall nv accept that as my adjective anyway.


something random, 3 people part of tpjc bball (including me), have the same bday.
WOAH!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BIFEI AND CHENGLIANG.
LOL.



btw, im gonna work really hard through the holidays, im sick of disappointing myself.
my summer is over, and i'm prepared to embrace the harsh winter.

When fear and emotions set in...

Unknowingly, fear somehow crept into me, into somewhere i can never reach. It feels really silly to do something that might make me crumble into dust somehow. It isn't about paranoia or whatnot. Probably, my greatest fear is myself.

My recent attitude and actions towards friends doesn't speak well of me at all. That's when my brain got the better of my heart.
i learnt a life lesson sometime in class this week. 闷. The key to unlock my heart is in my own hands. Probably after i unlock the door can i follow my heart in decision making and be a much happier person.
i have been pissed off easily these few days, maybe due to fatigue. But well, i guess i'm defintely in need of some anger mangement classes, or some other life lessons.

I need to be enlightened before i collapse.

mugging life is tough.

dang it, im sick of studying for tests. it makes me older by the second.

lack of sleep, lack of rest, im afraid my body cannot take it someday.

physics skill A tmr. damn. my process of studyin was slowed down by my bro's constant yakking on the phone beside me. that's dumb. 40 mins bhind my planned sleeping time.
napfa is like tmr as well, and shit it my ankle just seems to be getting worse.

im tired. really tired. an ex junior of mine said i looked more matured the last time he saw me. well i replied, "im getting on age."

as i scale the everest of tests, please, allow me to just escape reality for a moment and breathe. thankyou.

感触良多

刚从奶奶的生日聚会回来
看见了很多人
越来越多人
表姐表哥们都带了伴侣出席
大家成双成对的样子令我感到一点失措
咳~
什么时候轮到我呢？
什么时候才能跟‘她’一起参加家庭聚会呢？
刚巧这也是我叔叔给我的问题
但是我也不知道答案
哈！


今天不是说很开心
我始终认为一些人应该学习闭嘴
但是算了
别人的嘴我也不能帮他闭上
我就忍着点儿吧


打完这次的校际比赛后
我可能就不再打篮球了
到时候
就是养伤的良时
但是此刻
我将以我的能力把所有的本领使出来
为我的篮球生涯画上一个完美的据点


伤心的歌曲不停地播放
加上疲惫的身体
我不竟流下泪了

photos?

oops there is a problem with blogger shall post again some other day. (:


its 12.19am
happy bday farrhan, applelion, uchihahan, han, hansriver. lol (:

dropping by.

somehow, im not motivated to create a new blog pic.
so well, yea.
first game of A Div is over, and we edged out sajc 46-44.
what a close shave.

my ankle aint recovering quickly enough. this sucks. retarded.

next game on wednesday. against RJC. pray hard we will win this.

lastly, happy bday joeyee (:

A Divisions.

it begins tmr.
our first match will be on wednesday though.
win them all and we are thru to the nxt rounds.
so lets win ppl. (:


something random-
i love cuisine from everywhere.
i shall talk more about food some other time.
and also a post entitled "her/she"
yup i guess i'll take another week to post again.
i NID to MUG!
A lvls are drawing nearer.
and sadly my pw grade is just a mere B.
fk it.

yes and a new blog pic will be up soon. (:
byes~

cleared?

goodness, im finally feeling the life of my ankle. although pain still subsides in the ankle, but i now know that im going to get cleared and jump once again.

sidelined.

great now i have a sprained ankle.
and A Divs are just a week away.

i jus cant study.

its kinda hard to pass time when im alone at home. there's seriously nothing much i cna do with the computer when there is like practically no one online.
oh well, i guess i could study. but, the mood is just not there cause no one is at home now and i seriously find it too quiet to study alone. that's dumb i know. but well, i guess i'll continue rotting.

playtime's over

every holiday has an end. and today i shall mark it as my last day of holidays. reality is again checking in. let's just hope i do unexplainably well for this SA. lol.

A question and some sort of an answer.

i was questioned ytd night. why your blog is all the emo-emo stuffs. and it is pointed out that i'm actually/probably holding on too tightly to the past. *shrugs*
well, im unsure about this.
Its not exactly a bad thing that i'm holding on to the past is it? at least that was a happy me then; one adjective i find it hard to be used on me lately. (well, im not exactly unhappy either. it's rather hard to describe.)
my past is too precious a thing to let go. at this moment, there is probably little for me to cling on to and have them etched deeply in my memories. no. nothing.

return

yes im back.
i guess im not goin to do extremely well overall for this SA.
everypaper, there is just this huge weightage question that screws me up.
but whatever, im still looking foward to the results though.

i will be away.

i'll be away from my com for a while cos SAs are beginning tmr.
it would not be until wedneday afternn that you will see me online.
till then, wish me luck for my SAs. (:

and i wonder why the chanting for the deceased haven stop when it's 1030pm already.
i don;t blame the chanting but it's really hard to concentrate on studying though. tsk.

DANG IT.

FREAK IT. i still can't set my mind to work when the SAs are just 2 days away.
im still not done iwth any subjects yet thanks to the fed up schedule of my march holidays.
there just ain't enough time damm it. zzz.

its a sunny day

The sun has shone on us once again.

No la nina effect, no el nino effect, no whatever.

Let's all hope this weather continues for the rest of the day.

the brightbright sunny day. That's what we want. (:

enlightened?

I gazed at the dark clouds as i walked to school. It couldn't get any gloomier can it. But wait, somewhere amongst the clouds, i saw the sky. That glimpse of light gave me that much needed hope that the rain will stop. True enough, it stopped soon after. Though it rained again later.but i learnt something. even in the toughest of situations, where everything seems to be gone, hope still lies somewhere. It might sound like much a form of condolence to many of you, but well somehwere within me, i know this aint true. there is always hope. if you are thinking impossible, i'm telling you it's nothing.

Sucked.

yep i got to ask this question again, what's wrong with the weather? i'm telling myself the end of the world isnt coming anytime soon, but well, with the weirdweird weather and the melting caps, i couldn't have prayed more.
today had one of the weirdest weathers of maybe the decade. it started with a drizzle and turned into torrential rain. shortly after a blazing sun appears turning the atmosphere into a very humid one. and guess what the next minute dark clouds roam the skies and "wham" the rain fell even more heavily. and this cycle continued until ard 7pm when it stopped for 30mins and then it rained again.
what's wrong with the world momma?
and yes the cool winds this afternn just screwed up my study plans. i had a major delay so much so that i didnt manage to finish my plan b4 dinner.
math, physics and j2 chem are still waiting for me. and so is my bed. nites.

it's lethal.

yep im talkin about the copy-paste technique. yes im gonna agree it can help alot. But well it can produce a really huge damage as well.

Thinktime?

Amazingly, Mankind has the most workable brain amongst all other animals. But even more amazingly, some people just don't think of consequences and things like that. So tell me, am i thinking now or what? And is this ability of ours a threat to mankind as well? Well, i guess so.

HOLY DAYS

just when im prepared to take a breather, i realise that one week is seriously not enough.
so yep, i've decided to save this breather till the SA is over.

i guess holidays are a direct meaning of "holy shit" days.

backtrack,
econs test was today, not really a difficult paper, but i guess im not goin to ace it anyway.

btw,
training's on tomorrow. damn i missed morning trainings.


as term one draws to a close, lets take a look at some of my few short term sightings.
napfa is on term 2 wk 7/8 i heard. wich gives me exactly 7/8 wks to train up. running isnt a real problem, i've managed to clock my personal best of 11.15min in recent days. in addition i managed to clock a 7.02 for 1.6 too. and im finally passing my jumping station. sitnreach and situps are defintely not a problem. and i've improved on my shuttlerun too. 9.8s. i tot im nv goin to break the 10s record in my life. lol.
so yes pullups. dats wads troubling. i guess i'll have to train more. 5, dats easy.

Somebody save me.

March 02.
im seeing an avalanch in front of me.
but there must be a way out.
but again, time is running out.

Emotions

sometimes, i wished i could control my emotions more.
i hope tears can fall when i want them to. it just makes me feel better.


im losing precious minutes on the floor.
the same old feeling is coming back to me.
im losing confidence handling the ball.
i guess only one person can rescue me right now.
but well, i guess he is too busy for stuffs like that.

injuriesinjuriesinjuries.
totally hated by me.
it just so happen that my right ankle ain't in workable condition.
and it just so happen that time isn't on my side.

im facing troubled times. probably that's my life. for now.

a brief return.

yep i've made a brief return to this deserted blog of mine.

term 1 is almost over. jc life is simply getting tougher. tutorials & assignments are getting tougher to do, theories are getting harder to comprehend.

the mugging mood isnt there when SAs are just round the corner.

being back home @ approximately 730pm everyday and then studying till late have got me all worn out, so tired that i cant even find the mood to play bball.

im not getting enough rest really. my mind is just confused over some matters...

im leading a rather mundane life. but, well its quite pleasing sometimes that exciting ordeals in life just spring up in front of me.

till next time, i shall dedicate this post to one of my best friends that i have known, CYC.
its his bday today. happy bday (:

HAPPY FRIENDSHIP WEEK!

happy VALENTINE'S DAY!
for all those who gave me gifts today,
its gladly appreciated by me. thank you. (:

chinese new year visiting is over.
people change.
some time down the road, i might see some of my cousins inviting a fist in their face. lol.
that's the blatant truth.

goin to coach's home on sunday. great. at least my dinner is settled. (:

dogsdogsdogs.
dun some of them have a bttr life den humans?

reality is abt to set in again.
for now, i shall have my well deserved break.

HAPPY CNY everyone!

finally the end of the wk.
the wk of endurance tst is over.
*breathes a sigh of relieve*
im relived. definitely.
cny just ard the corner. but well however, i cant seem to feel the intense atmosphere wich shud be ard. probably cos im stucked in the mugger's world ryt now.
chem spa was ok jus dat i forgot to write an eqn. but hope i still get lvl 8 though.

i've let my work pile up for the first time in 08. im outta gas to do ani work le.

ogl camp is over. wasnt demanding for a camp. but well, my family sux cos onli gt 3 guys outta 12 family members. how to cheer like dat? i lost my voice on day 1 of camp la. like such a loser family. wadeva, DIONYSUS girls bttr buck up. lol. XD but well on 2nd tots everyone did their part. applause. clapclap.

it's going to be a long and rough week ahead.
monday trg
tues test
wed trg
thurs end late
fri trg/hnf/ogl thingy.
sat chem spa skill A/ ogl thing
sun chiong tutorials&stuffs.
whr gt time?

jiayou weiqing! dun break down now.

the passing of a friend.
a disheartening fact.
everything that could be done is done.
let's all learn to let go.

my condolences to his family and friends.

goodbye friend.

2 weeks gone.

its been a while.
first post of 2008.
2 wks of 08 gone.
8 days of sch gone.
spe and pe were monsters. they just made me run and run and run till i drop dead.
lectures lectures lectures. they just give me a headache.
GP lessons in the afternn are a heartache.
trg's till 8, jus make me dead.

the above jus sumed up my fatigue lvl.
im tired. so early in the term.
looks like i do need some will power to get me thru.

my brother's old tjc notes sit beside my com now. and thinkin that im gonna read that huge a stack of tpjc notes for my a's this yr, jus kills my mood for now.

finally the sch is opening up places for ogls. teamed up wif long. hope that it will be a successful application for i fear the my sgc will be a barren plot of land.

spa is on wk 5 & 7.
hope i can get my lvl 8s.



photoshop cs3 suddenly cant work. nid cd key. -.-
spoilt my plans of making a new graphic. but well nvm.
mugging is more important.

so... bye!