detached

a sense of detachment, a sense of loneliness.

damn it this is one reason i hate holidays which i need to bury myself in the notes.
it just makes me an emo kid.

i'm running without headway.
someday, i might very well just bang into a wall.
but let's hope that day doesn't come.

urgh, holidays doesn't seem to liberate my mind anymore.
Here i am sitting in front of the computer early in the afternoon, trying to understand my correlation and regression tutorial. sadly, my mind just gets more clogged up with other thoughts that i'm spending more than enough time on the computer.

it appears that i'm running out of gas.

to rest my ankle, i have absented myself from basketball sessions.
yes, total abstinence from basketball and all other sports.
and without basking in the sun, i'm feeling rather sickly.

and then, i'm counting down.
i glance over to my calendar, for once, i've not written many things on it.
but then, it appears that i have too little time and too many things to catch up on.

i'm getting lonely again.
i miss him, her and you.
i probably miss my old life.
and no matter how hard i'm trying to make time for them, i just can't make time for myself.

probably i'll just dump all my things in a corner and relax abit before holidays really end.

probably i just lack resting time. maybe i'll just waste my one day sleeping away. why not? i've been having good dreams lately, only to be woken up by my alarm clock.


i wonder why i have such a controlled life, and its not even controlled by me nor even my family. its by some nonsensical curriculum of the MOE. why can't we just go back to the cavemen stage? it's gonna be so much fun.


alright any more rambling i'll be even more behind time.

i shall sign off here. and i wonder who is going to waste their time reading this emo text. probably no one. haha.